The things I learnt from watching The Break-Up today:
- Don’t ever be mean to anyone who means a lot to you, especially your loved ones and especially the love of your life. Why would you even think of being cruel to the one you love? And it’s worse when you think that it’s to try to bring them around and to get them back to you. What if it backfires and then, they will be forever lost to you. Why is it that we always seem to hurt most the ones we love best?
- Yelling brings the argument nowhere. Not only is yelling detrimental to your eardrums, it is also hurtful to the one you are yelling at. Wouldn’t it be nice if we could all keep our tempers in check, are able to sit down and talk nicely to each other about what the problem or issue at hand is all about? Let’s talk. Properly.
- Pride is the fall of any relationships. When there are winners, there are also losers. And we certainly don’t want losers in any relationships. Pride makes us think irrationally. Pride makes us behave without reason. Pride makes us do things to make us look good but the other person look bad. Do we really want that? Please. Put aside your pride when you are facing the love of your life.
- Don’t ever hope to change another person in any relationships. There is a rationale for every proverb that ever exist. A leopard never changes its spots. No one likes to be constantly reminded, always nagged or yelled at once in a while about one thing or another. If he/she is like that, you will do all that because of your wishful thinking that you have the power to change them. Save your effort. They will just end up thinking that you are such a bore, a nag or worse, hating your for making them feel bad.
- Heed the warning signs before you decide to get more serious and tie the knot. Don’t ever think that things will get better once this or that happens. Things will probably remain the way it is because it all bores down to the people, not circumstances. And looking back at what No.4 says, if you or him/her doesn’t change, chances are nothing will change. For the better, no. For the worse, most probably. So, time to get out before things become worse.
- Best friends are great to have around but sometimes you should take their advice with a pinch of salt. Best friends are god-sent. Best friends are a blessing. Best friends are one of life’s joys. But when it comes to your relationship with the one you love, best friends are relegated to the sidelines. Sure, they will be there to share your joys and halve your sorrows (hopefully not many when you love and are loved) but when it comes to your relationship, you decide. You are the one living it and living with the consequences.
- Don’t do unto others what you won’t do to yourself. With reference to No.1, I wonder how we, or anyone for that matter, can conjure things up to hurt another. If only we could all learn to be nice, to be more considerate, to be more appreciative, to be kinder.. What a wonderful world this old world would truly be.
- A relationship is between two persons. Don’t drag other people into it just yet when you are not done with each other. Meaning unless you have really broken up, don’t go dating other people or showing them off to make him/her jealous. It might work or it might not but you’ll also end up hurting yourself and him/her. Again, refer to No.1.
- Don’t be afraid to cry if you really feel like crying. But no false tears! No emotional blackmail! What I mean is real tears that show how sad you really are inside. It is good to show your emotions. Don’t keep all of it bottled up inside. The other person is no mind reader and it’s up to you to let him/her know what you are feeling. Be expressive.
- Do something that hurts you now rather than being hurt worse next time. Much as you love him/her but if you are irritated to no ends by them and the red lights are already flashing bright and clear, call it quits. You can still be good friends. You can still bump into each other on the street and smile and say hi to each other. Cherish the beautiful memories you have created and be thankful for them. Even if things weren’t meant to be between you and him/her.
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